JIMALALUD, Negros Oriental — A bride’s account of her October 8 wedding at the Holy Child Parish Church in Jimalalud has gone viral on social media. She says church staff held up her bridal march because the bridesmaids’ gowns showed their shoulders. The parish has since issued an official statement apologizing to anyone who was hurt, while asking the public to stop attacking its church servants online.
Jimalalud Vice Mayor Reynaldo Vidal Tuanda has also appealed to residents to “put to rest” the issue. He said the online exchanges were “just displaying our dirty linen in public.”
The bride’s account
According to the bride, the wedding party arrived at the church at 1:00 p.m. for a Mass scheduled at 2:00 p.m. She said their entry was delayed after church staff reportedly objected to the bridesmaids’ attire, which left their shoulders exposed.
The bride said the party appealed for consideration because they had understood that the church only prohibited showing cleavage. Their wedding coordinator then reportedly looked for fabric to cover the bridesmaids’ shoulders, which delayed the bridal march.
The bride also said the priest did not wait for her to finish walking down the aisle before the next part of the ceremony began. She said the lights inside the church were switched off while the couple was still taking photos after the Mass.
A video circulating online shows the wedding entourage gathered at the church entrance, with several people adjusting the bridesmaids’ red gowns before the procession enters.
Parish issues statement
In an official statement, the Holy Child Parish of Jimalalud, under the Diocese of Dumaguete, asked the public to “exercise prudence, restraint, and responsibility” in commenting on and sharing information about the social media post.
“On behalf of the entire Holy Child Parish of Jimalalud, we would also like to extend our sincere apologies to anyone who may have felt offended, hurt, or misunderstood by the circumstances surrounding this matter or by any statements and actions associated with it. We sincerely regret any distress or misunderstanding that may have arisen,” the parish said.
The parish also defended its church servants and volunteers. It asked the public to refrain from “malicious accusations, hurtful remarks, or unfounded allegations” against people who it said “willingly offer their time, effort, and service” to the parish, often without expecting anything in return.
Responding to an allegation made in a Facebook comment, the parish said “the Church is not driven by the pursuit of money or personal financial gain.” It said fees and offerings for parish services support the church’s needs, maintenance and ministries, and “should not automatically be interpreted as evidence that the Church is seeking profit or taking advantage of the faithful.”
Dress code and wedding schedule
The parish restated its dress code and its wedding schedule rules. It said that “couples and their entourage are expected to observe the Parish’s guidelines for modest and appropriate clothing inside the Church.” It encouraged couples to coordinate with the Parish Office beforehand to clarify the dress code and other arrangements.
The statement listed the terms of the parish’s Memorandum of Agreement with couples:
- The bride and groom must be inside the church at least 30 minutes before the scheduled start of the Mass.
- The bridal entourage must be ready and assembled at least 15 minutes before the scheduled start.
- If the wedding is delayed by 15 minutes, the bridal entourage will no longer be permitted to march in procession.
- If the wedding is delayed by 30 minutes, the bridal procession and wedding songs will no longer be permitted.
- If the wedding is delayed by 45 minutes, the Mass will no longer be celebrated and only the marriage rites will be conducted.
- Flower girls, ring bearers and arras bearers must be at least seven years old and must have received their First Holy Communion.
The parish’s statement does not respond individually to the points raised in the bride’s account. It said concerns should be raised “through the appropriate channels and established procedures” rather than through public accusations online.
The statement bears the name of parish priest Rev. Fr. Cecilio E. Bomediano.
Vice mayor appeals for calm
In a Facebook post, Vice Mayor Tuanda urged Jimalalud residents, “Catholics or non-Catholics alike,” to stop posting, commenting and arguing about which side was at fault.
“Ato nani tak-upan, sirhan ug hunongon ang paghisgot sa maong panghitabo,” he wrote, which roughly translates to “Let us now put a lid on this, close it, and stop talking about the incident.” He also asked residents not to fuel the dispute with more comments “so the fire of misunderstanding will die down.”
Tuanda said that “when rules are heartily followed,” conflict and controversy can be avoided. He added that his post “is not meant to favor or side with any of the conflicting parties but merely to ask everyone to put to an end this uncalled for viral issue.”
